Friday, February 24, 2006

Wannabe Gangsters

In case anybody still doesn't know, I moved from Columbia to Randallstown, which is still in the great state of Mary's Land, and closer to Baltimore City than Columbia is, but it is still not a ghetto. Let me elaborate.

What makes a ghetto is the thugs and gangstas that live there. Well, you've got different degrees of thugs and gangsters. Columbia is too far from Baltimore or DC to really be affected, it's mostly full of suburban kids who think they're hard. They're not hard at all. I mean, look at me. We have a word for this group: posers. You can walk up to them and kick their ass, and they just cry and run home and play Everquest.

Randallstown is closer to Baltimore City, but in the end, it is still a suburb, albeit an older suburb, but you still have caldesacs and driveways and whatnot. You see people that look like thugs, who may talk a lot of shit, and sometimes back their shit up, which is something that the poser gangstas never do. So they're a little harder than those Columbian kids, but they're still suburbanites. We will call these the wannabe gangsters. You can walk up to them and kick their ass, and they'll just run home and play Grand Theft Auto and kill some strippers to get their hard back.

The real thugs can be seen in Baltimore City neighborhoods, such as Brooklyn, Dundalk-- no that's just disease-ridden prostitutes, Druid Hill, Park Heights, and Highlandtown. Those are places where you do not dare walk around when the sun has gone down. You stick to Downtown, where you can see crackheads on Lombard Street pushing a lawn mower while waiting for a bus. These are the bad ass motherfucker gangstas. You even approach these thugs with any sort of disrespect and they'll make you cry and run home and play something so far beyond Everquest... that's right, you'll play Furcadia.

Let's recap:
Columbia = Poser gangsta
Randallstown = Wannabe gangsta
Baltimore City = Bad Ass Motherfucker gangsta

Alright, remember to chew your spaghetti.